The Cardinals have gotten off to an 0-2 start. It isn’t the end of the world. But, with the Reds, Pirates and Cubs having wins, it certainly feels like the End Days are upon us.
So lets take a breather. The Cardinals WILL win. They have to. After all, they are the Cardinals. They are not losers. They don’t have a curse (that we know of) and, well, losing just isn’t something the Cardinals should accept! Especially to the Padres.
So at 1:15 p.m., today, we need to get back on track!
Jaime Garcia gets the start. You had an awful spring. It’s time to shake that off and play like Jaime.
Albert Pujols. You need not put the burdens of this team on your shoulders. After all, you have a lot on your mind with that big payday coming at season’s end. Hey check that … play like you deserve that $300 million a year you want!
David Freese. Stay off that ankle, OK. You will probably be in your bubble of safety today. Enjoy it, stay out of the weight room. Don’t let this losing streak get you down, buddy!
Ryan Theriot. Use your glove. That’s why you have it! Do something fabulous! We want to love you! Otherwise, we are going to be afraid you still have that Bad-Cubbie-Joo-Joo on you!
Yadi. You should have consulted us before you got those neck tats. That’s all.
Allen Craig. Keep hitting that ball well! You are going to make me like you after all!
Colby. Keep it up.
LB. I still like you, sir! Keep it up and give us a homer!
Matt Holliday. Our friend Kelly is upset with you. She is the appendix whisperer … she could have helped you!
We will get through this, Cardinals Nation!! We will win!!
Miranda covers Cardinals baseball for Aaron Miles Fastball. Follow her on the Twitter, @missmiranda